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Replenish Testosterone Naturally
Plant extracts favorably alter hormone metabolism and improve sexual desire in menThrough a variety of mechanisms, aging men suffer from the dual effects of having too little testosterone and excess estrogen. The result is a testosterone/ estrogen imbalance that can severely inhibit sexual desire and performance. In youth, low amounts of estrogen are used to turn off the powerful cell-stimulating effects of testosterone. As estrogen levels increase with age, testosterone cell stimulation may be locked in the "off" position, thus reducing sexual arousal and sensation and causing the common loss of libido so common in aging men. The genital/pelvic region is packed with testosterone receptors that are ultra-sensitive to free testosterone-induced sexual stimulation. Clinical studies using testosterone injections, creams or patches have not always provided a long-lasting libido enhancing effect in aging men. We now know why. Aging men sometimes convert testosterone to estrogen. The estrogen is then taken up by testosterone receptor sites in cells throughout the body. When an estrogen molecule occupies a testosterone receptor site on a cell membrane, it blocks the ability of serum testosterone to induce a healthy hormonal signal. It does not matter how much serum free testosterone is available if excess estrogen is competing for the same cellular receptor sites. Testosterone is a hormone responsible for sex drive in both men and women. For testosterone to promote youthful sexual interest, satisfaction and performance, it must be freely available to cell receptor sites in the brain, the nerves, muscles and genitals. As people age, testosterone becomes bound to serum globulin and is not available to the cell receptor sites were it is needed to initiate sex stimulating centers in the brain. The component in the blood that renders free testosterone inactive is called sex hormone-binding globulin (SHBG). Excess estrogen can increase the production of SHBG and block testosterone-receptor sites. This means there are two mechanisms by which excess estrogen interferes with sex dive in aging males. For testosterone to produce long-lasting libido enhancing effects, it must be kept in the "free" form in the bloodstream. Bound testosterone is not able to be picked up by testosterone receptors on cell membranes. For aging men, it is desirable to suppress excess levels of SHBG and estrogen while boosting free testosterone to the level of a young man. There is now a natural way of modulating testosterone and estrogen levels in aging men that does not require expensive prescription drugs. Restoring youthful hormone balance can have a significant impact on male sexuality. To reiterate, the hormone modulation objectives that most aging men need to facilitate sexual rejuvenation involves an increase in "free" testosterone coupled by a decrease in both estrogen and SHGD levels. Increasing testosterone by suppressing excess estrogen For many men, a safe and easy way to increase free testosterone is to prevent it from being converted (aromatized) into excess estrogen. Too much estrogen plays havoc with a man's sex life by binding to testosterone receptor sites and may contribute to the over-production of SHBG. SHBG binds free testosterone in a way that makes it unavailable to receptor sites in the brain, nerves and genitals. Estrogen overload is a serious problem in aging men. One report showed that estrogen levels of the average 54-year-old man are higher than those of the average 59-year-old woman. Estrogen is a necessary hormone for men, but too much causes a wide range of health problems. High serum levels of estrogen also trick the brain into thinking that enough testosterone is being produced, thereby slowing the natural production of testosterone. Based on the multiple deleterious effects of excess estrogen in men, aggressive actions should be taken to reduce estrogen to a safe range. To determine if estrogen levels are too high, men are encouraged to have their blood tested for estradiol. If the blood test results show estradiol levels are greater than 30 pg/mL, men should consider radical lifestyle changes, and/or taking an aromatase-inhibiting nutrient or drug. A numerical example of the effects of a nutritional aromatase inhibitor can be seen on one of the subjects in the pilot studies whose initial serum estradiol level was a high 54 and free testosterone a moderately low 14.4. After only 30 days on a nutritional aromatase inhibitor, estradiol levels fell to 36 (from 54) and free testosterone levels increased to 22.5 (from 14.4). In this pilot study, funded by The Life Extension Foundation, 9 of 10 test subjects showed a significant decline in excess estrogen levels when several herbal extracts were combined. These kinds of results show how some men reduce excess estrogen while boosting free testosterone. Herbs and male sexual potency There are herbal extracts that have been shown to either increase or decrease testosterone levels. The New England Journal of Medicine (1998, 339;785-91) showed that an herbal preparation called PC Spes had the dual effect of suppressing testosterone and increasing estrogen and was therefore beneficial in the treatment of prostate cancer. Conversely, herbs that increase free testosterone and suppress excess estrogen are highly desirable for healthy men over age 40 who suffer the premature aging effects of a testosterone deficit, including loss of libido. We discuss some of these herbal extracts here. Chrysin A bioflavonoid called chrysin has shown potential as a natural aromatase-inhibitor. Chrysin can be extracted from various plants. Body builders have used it as a testosterone boosting supplement. The problem with chrysin is that because of its poor absorption into the bloodstream, it has not produced the testosterone enhancing effects users expect. In a study published in Biochemical Pharmacology (1999, Vol.58), the specific mechanisms of chrysin's absorption impairment were identified, which infers that the addition of a pepper extract (piperine) could significantly enhance the bioavailability of chrysin. Pilot studies have found that when chrysin is combined with piperine, reductions in serum estrogen (estradiol) and increases in total and free testosterone result in 30 days. Aromatase-inhibiting drugs are used to treat women with estrogen-dependant breast cancers. The rationale for this therapy is that estrogen is produced by fat cells via a process known as aromatization. Aging men often have excess aromatase enzyme activity, and the result is that too much of their testosterone is "aromatized" into estrogen. In a study published in the Journal of Steroid Biochemical Molecular Biology (1993;Vol 46, No 3), chrysin and 10 other flavonoids were compared to an aromatase-inhibiting drug (aminoglutethimide). The study tested the aromatase-inhibiting effects of these natural flavonoids (such as genistein, rutin, tea catechins, etc.) in human fat cell cultures. Chrysin was the most potent aromatase-inhibitor, and was shown to be similar in potency and effectiveness to the aromatase-inhibiting drug. The scientists conducting the study concluded by stating that the aromatase-inhibiting effects of certain flavonoids may contribute to the cancer preventive effects of plant-based diets. Two recent studies have identified specific mechanisms by which chrysin inhibits aromatase in human cells. These studies demonstrate that chrysin is a more potent inhibitor of the aromatase enzyme than phyto-estrogens and other flavonoids that are known to have aromatase-inhibiting properties (Arch Pharm Res 1999 Jun;22(3):309-12; J Steroid Biochem Mol Biol 1997 Apr;61(3-6):107-15). The purpose of these studies was to ascertain which fruits and vegetables should be included in the diet of postmenopausal women to reduce the incidence of breast cancer. Excess levels of mutagenic forms of estrogen have been linked to a greater risk of breast cancer, and scientists are studying dietary means of naturally reducing levels of these dangerous estrogens. Flavonoids such as chrysin are of considerable interest because they suppress excess estrogen via their aromatase-inhibiting properties. While this cancer preventing effect is most important for women, inhibiting aromatase in aging men has tremendous potential for naturally suppressing excess estrogen while boosting low levels of testosterone to a youthful state. Since chrysin is not a patentable drug, don't expect to see a lot of human research documenting its effects. There are lots of FDA approved drugs that inhibit aromatase (such as Arimidex), and there is not much economic interest in finding natural ways of replacing these drugs. While prescription aromatase-inhibiting drugs are relatively free of side effects, aging men who are seeking to gain control over their sex hormone levels often prefer natural sources, rather than trying to convince a physician to prescribe a drug (such as Arimidex) that is not yet approved by the FDA as an anti-aging therapy. (Arimidex is prescribed to estrogen-dependant breast cancer patients to prevent testosterone and other hormones in the body from converting, i.e. aromatasing, into estrogen.) An advantage to using plant extracts to boost testosterone in lieu of drugs is that the plant extracts have ancillary health benefits. Chrysin, for example, is a potent antioxidant that possesses vitamin-like effects in the body. It has been shown to induce an anti-inflammatory effect, possibly through inhibition of the enzymes 5-lipoxygenase and cyclooxygenase inflammation pathways. Aging is being increasingly viewed as a pro-inflammatory process, and agents that inhibit chronic inflammation may protect against diseases as diverse as atherosclerosis, senility and aortic valve stenosis. Chrysin is one of many flavonoids being studied as a phyto-extract that may prevent some forms of cancer. If chrysin can boost free testosterone in the aging male by inhibiting the aromatase enzyme, this would provide men with a low cost natural supplement that could provide the dual anti-aging benefits of testosterone replacement and aromatase-inhibiting drug therapy. As previously discussed, boosting free testosterone levels can have a dramatic effect on sex drive, performance and satisfaction. Pilot studies indicate that chrysin increases total and free testosterone levels in the majority of men who take it with piperine. Chrysin has one other property that could add to its libido-enhancing potential. A major cause of sexual dissatisfaction among men is work-related stress and anxiety. Another problem some men have is "sexual performance anxiety" that prevents them from being able to achieve erections when they are expected to. In a study published in Pharmacology Biochemistry and Behavior (1994, Vol 47), mice were injected with diazepam (Valium), chrysin or placebo to evaluate the effects these substances had on anxiety and performance levels. Chrysin was shown to produce anti-anxiety effects comparable with diazepam, but without sedation and muscle relaxation. In other words, chrysin produced a relaxing effect in the brain, but with no impairment of motor activity. The mechanism of action of chrysin was compared to diazepam, and it was shown that unlike diazepam, chrysin can reduce anxiety without inducing the common side-effects associated with benzodiazepine drugs. A common problem with benzodiazepine drugs is memory impairment. In a study published in a 1997 issue of Pharmacology Biochemistry and Behavior (Vol 58, No 4), chrysin displayed potent anti-anxiety effects in rats, but did not interfere with cognitive performance. In this study, diazepam was shown to inhibit neurological function, but chrysin (and other anti-anxiety flavonoids) had no effect on training or test session performance. The scientists conducting this study pointed out that chrysin selectively inhibits anxiety in the brain but, unlike diazepam, does not induce the cognitive impairment. Chrysin may therefore offer libido-enhancing effects in the aging male by: - Increasing free testosterone, - Decreasing excess estrogen, - Producing a safe anti-anxiety effect. Chrysin is being sold to body builders by commercial supplement companies that do not know if their product is favorably modulating testosterone and estrogen levels in men. The Life Extension Foundation, on the other hand, has conducted meticulous studies to evaluate the effects of chrysin (combined with piperine to facilitate absorption) on aging men. These studies have produced some impressive preliminary data, and ongoing research will be reported in future issues of Life Extension magazine. Nettle About 90% of testosterone is produced by the testes, the remainder by the adrenal glands. Testosterone functions as an aphrodisiac hormone in brains cells, and as an anabolic hormone in the development of bone and skeletal muscle. But testosterone that becomes bound to serum globulin is not available to cell receptor sites and fails to induce a libido effect. It is, therefore, desirable to increase levels of "free testosterone" in order to ignite sexual arousal in the brain. As discussed already, a hormone that controls levels of free testosterone is called sex hormone-binding globulin (SHBG). When testosterone binds to SHBG, it loses its biological activity and becomes known as "bound testosterone," as opposed to the desirable "free testosterone." As men age past year 45, SHBG's binding capacity increases almost dramatically-by 40% on average-and coincides with the age-associated loss of libido. Some studies show that the decline in sexual interest with advancing age is not always due to the amount of testosterone produced, but rather to the increased binding of testosterone to globulin by SHBG. This explains why some older men who are on testosterone replacement therapy do not report a long-term aphrodisiac effect. That is, the artificially administered testosterone becomes bound by SHBG, and is not bioavailable to cellular receptor sites where it would normally produce a libido-enhancing effect. It should be noted that the liver also causes testosterone to bind to globulin. This liver-induced binding of testosterone is worsened by the use of sedatives, anti-hypertensives, tranquilizers and alcoholic beverages. The overuse of drugs and alcohol could explain why some men do not experience a libido-enhancing effect when consuming drugs and plant-based aphrodisiacs. An interesting review, "How Desire Dies" (Nature, 381/6584, 1996), discusses how frequently prescribed drugs, such as beta-blockers and antidepressants, cause sexual dysfunction. Prescription drugs of all sorts have been linked to inhibition of libido. Logically, one way of increasing libido in older men would be to block the testosterone-binding effects of SHBG. This would leave more testosterone in its free, sexually activating form. A highly concentrated extract from the nettle root provides a unique mechanism for increasing levels of free testosterone. Recent European research has identified constituents of nettle root that bind to SHBG in place of testosterone, thus reducing SHBG's binding of free testosterone. As the authors of one study state, these constituents of nettle root "may influence the blood level of free, i.e. active, steroid hormones by displacing them from the SHBG bindings site." The prostate gland also benefits from nettle root. In Germany, nettle root has been used as a treatment for benign prostatic hyperplasia (enlargement of the prostate gland) for decades. A metabolite of testosterone called dihydrotestosterone (DHT) stimulates prostate growth, leading to enlargement. Nettle root inhibits the binding of DHT to attachment sites on the prostate membrane. Nettle extracts also inhibit enzymes such as 5 alpha reductase that cause testosterone to convert to DHT. It is the DHT metabolite of testosterone that is known to cause benign prostate enlargement, excess facial hair and hair loss at the top of the head. Muira puama French scientists have identified an herbal extract that has shown libido enhancing effects in two human clinical studies. Muira puama comes from the stems and roots of the Ptychopetalum olacoides plant, and is widely used in the Amazon region of South America as an aphrodisiac, tonic and cure for rheumatism and muscle paralysis. Muira puama has been the subject of two published clinical studies conducted by Dr. Jacques Waynberg, an eminent medical sexologist and author of 10 books on the subject. The first study, conducted at the Institute of Sexology in Paris under Waynberg's supervision, was reported in the November 1994 issue of The American Journal of Natural Medicine. The study population consisted of 262 men complaining of lack of sexual desire, or inability to attain or maintain erection. After two weeks, 62 percent of patients with loss of libido rated the treatment as having a dynamic effect, while 52 percent of patients with erectile dysfunction rated the treatment as beneficial. The article goes on to compare muira puama favorably to yohimbine, stating, "Muira puama may provide better results than yohimbine without side effects." Dr. Waynberg's second study, entitled "Male Sexual Asthenia," focused on sexual difficulties associated with asthenia, a deficiency state characterized by fatigue, loss of strength, or debility, all symptoms of a testosterone deficiency. The study population consisted of 100 men over 18 years of age who complained of impotence or loss of libido, or both. A total of 94 men completed the study and were evaluated. Muira puama treatment led to significantly increased frequency of intercourse for 66% of couples. Of the 46 men who complained of loss of desire, 70% reported intensification of libido. The stability of erection during intercourse was restored in 55% of patients and 66% of men reported a reduction in fatigue. Other beneficial effects included improvement in sleep and morning erections. Treatment with muira puama was much more effective in cases with the least psychosomatic involvement. Of the 26 men diagnosed with common sexual asthenia without noticeable sign of psychosomatic disorder, the treatment was effective for asthenia in 100% of cases, the lack of libido in 85% of cases, and for inability of coital erection in 90% of cases. The latter finding confirms that broad tonic action of muira puama on conditions of fatigue and stress related sexual dysfunction. Since muira puama is not an artificial stimulant, it fortifies the system over a period of time. Some men report increased vitality within two weeks, while the full effects build over several weeks. Dr. Waynberg notes that his toxicology studies and observations corroborate the conclusions of the scientific literature on the absence of toxicity of muira puama, which is well tolerated by men in general good health. One of the earliest scientific studies of muira puama was conducted by another French doctor, Dr. Rebourgeon. His research found the plant to be effective in "gastrointestinal and circulatory asthenia as well as impotence." Three of the most respected scientific authorities on medical herbalism recommend muira puama. In newly published books, James Duke, Ph.D., Chief of the United States Department of Agriculture's Medical Plant Laboratory, and Michael Murray, M.D., recommend muira puama for erectile dysfunction or lack of libido. In addition, Daniel Mowrey, Ph.D., states the following in his book Herbal Tonic Therapies (p. 358): Few in number are the plants that seem to have a reliable reputation as true aphrodisiacs. . . . Snake oil remedies abound, and confusion, dishonesty and hyped-up placebo razzmatazz carry the day. Out of this mess, one plant, virtually unknown to most Americans, appears to have risen above the competition. The plant is called muira puama. And though not much is known scientifically about the plant, all indications would lead one to believe that here is a material with the potential for making an important and significant contribution to the health of the male reproductive system. Based on the clinical reports documenting the libido and energy enhancing effects of muira puama, it is possible that this herb induces these positive changes by favorably altering the hormone balance in aging men, i.e. increases free testosterone and/or suppresses excess estrogen. Putting it all together Enhanced sexual enjoyment is of paramount importance to a great many people, increasingly so as we age. An enormous amount of published data documents the libido-enhancing effects that occur when testosterone is restored to a youthful level. Testosterone is much more than a sex hormone. There are testosterone receptor sites in cells throughout the body, most notably in the brain and heart. Youthful protein synthesis for maintaining muscle mass and bone formation requires testosterone. Testosterone improves oxygen uptake throughout the body, helps control blood sugar, regulate cholesterol and maintain immune surveillance. The body requires testosterone to maintain youthful cardiac output and neurological function. Men suffering from depression often have lower levels of testosterone than control subjects. For some men, elevating free testosterone levels could prove to be an effective anti-depressant therapy. There is a scientific basis for free testosterone levels being measured in men suffering from depression and replacement therapy initiated if free testosterone levels are low normal or below normal. One of the most misunderstood hormones is testosterone. Body builders tarnished the reputation of testosterone by putting large amounts of synthetic testosterone drugs into their young bodies. Synthetic testosterone abuse can produce detrimental effects, but this has nothing to do with the benefits a man over age 40 can enjoy by properly restoring his natural testosterone to a youthful level. The many health benefits of hormone modulation therapy in aging men is the subject of these books authored by highly respected medical doctors: Vitality and Potency, by Jonathan V. Wright, M.D. and Lane Lenard, Ph.D. and The Testosterone Syndrome, co-authored by Eugene Shippen, M.D. These books provide meticulous molecular details, along with many case histories relating to the sexual enhancing effects that occur when free testosterone is increased beyond normal "middle-aged" levels. In the November 1999 issue of this publication, an in-depth article described complex pharmaceutical methods of increasing free testosterone using FDA approved drugs. Many members, however, inquired about natural ways of increasing testosterone while suppressing excess estrogen. Ongoing research at The Life Extension Foundation has resulted in several plant extracts being identified that appear to increase free testosterone and suppress excess estrogen in most men. In addition, clinical studies on one of these plant extracts indicates a significant libido-enhancing effect in the majority of men in placebo-controlled trials. Men over age 40 now have the option of using testosterone patches or creams that need to be prescribed by their physician, or they can try a new combination of plant extracts that have shown promising results. Results from published studies continue to substantiate the critical role that testosterone plays in protecting against premature aging. Life Extension magazine readers will be kept informed on scientifically validated testosterone enhancing strategies in future issues. Excess Estrogen and age-associated immune dysfunction It is well known that aging results in the shrinkage of the thymus gland, along with a reduction in the secretion of thymic hormones and T-cells, all of which are essential for maintaining youthful immune synchronization. A study published in the journal Immnological Reviews (1997, Vol 160) showed that excess estrogen may be the primary sex hormone responsible for age-induced thymic involution (shrinkage) and age-associated immune dysfunction. The name of this extensive study was "Thymic Aging and T-Cell Regeneration," and it suggested that hormone modulation was one way of accomplishing thymic regeneration. A chapter from the 1998 textbook Principles and Practices of Geriatric Medicine entitled "Immunity and Aging" also discussed the role sex steroid hormones play in thymic involution. These studies suggest that restoring youthful sex hormone profiles could assist in protecting against immune impairment caused by the shrinking thymus gland. Hormone modulating nutrients: the studies As described in the November 1999 issue of Life Extension magazine, there are testosterone drugs and estrogen suppressing drugs that can be prescribed by your doctor. Understandably, however, some people do not want to use drugs if nutrients can accomplish the same objective. In order to ascertain the safety and efficacy of various nutrients that are purported to modulate male hormone levels, The Life Extension Foundation has been sponsoring clinical studies to assess the effects of specific supplements on blood levels of testosterone, estrogen, SHBG, etc. The results from the first pilot study showed that nine out of 10 men experienced a significant reduction in serum estradiol (estrogen) levels after only thirty days, compared to baseline. In this brief study, total testosterone increased in seven out of 10 men, but free testosterone increased in only four of the 10 men studied. Other blood parameters were not statistically altered. A more comprehensive study incorporating a different combination of nutrients resulted in 8 out of 8 men experiencing increases in free testosterone while levels of the undesirable SHBG declined in seven out of eight men, compared to baseline. Estrogen and other blood parameters were not significantly altered in this study. A third study was undertaken to evaluate still another combination of nutrients. It revealed that after thirty days, 12 out of 17 men experienced an increase in total testosterone and 11 out of 17 showed an increase in free testosterone, compared to baseline. Again, other blood parameters were not significantly altered. Clinical trials are ongoing, and are expected to continue into early year 2000. Medical Testing For the average male over age 40, increasing free testosterone can restore the sexual fire of youth. The only downside to increasing free testosterone levels to those of a healthy 21-year-old is the potential effects it may have on men with prostate cancer. Before embarking on a testosterone-enhancement program a baseline blood PSA test and a digital rectal exam taken to rule out existing prostate cancer. When using testosterone drugs, PSA blood tests should be taken every 30-45 days for the first five months to rule out hidden prostate cancer. When using slower acting testosterone boosting nutritional supplements, PSA testing can be reduced to every 60-90 days for the first eight months. Remember, the preponderance of the published literature shows that increasing free testosterone does not increase the risk of cancer in healthy men, but those with existing prostate cancer should avoid testosterone boosting drugs and supplements.
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Replenish Testosterone Naturally
Plant extracts favorably alter hormone metabolism and improve sexual desire in menThrough a variety of mechanisms, aging men suffer from the dual effects of having too little testosterone and excess estrogen. The result is a testosterone/ estrogen imbalance that can severely inhibit sexual desire and performance. In youth, low amounts of estrogen are used to turn off the powerful cell-stimulating effects of testosterone. As estrogen levels increase with age, testosterone cell stimulation may be locked in the "off" position, thus reducing sexual arousal and sensation and causing the common loss of libido so common in aging men. The genital/pelvic region is packed with testosterone receptors that are ultra-sensitive to free testosterone-induced sexual stimulation. Clinical studies using testosterone injections, creams or patches have not always provided a long-lasting libido enhancing effect in aging men. We now know why. Aging men sometimes convert testosterone to estrogen. The estrogen is then taken up by testosterone receptor sites in cells throughout the body. When an estrogen molecule occupies a testosterone receptor site on a cell membrane, it blocks the ability of serum testosterone to induce a healthy hormonal signal. It does not matter how much serum free testosterone is available if excess estrogen is competing for the same cellular receptor sites. Testosterone is a hormone responsible for sex drive in both men and women. For testosterone to promote youthful sexual interest, satisfaction and performance, it must be freely available to cell receptor sites in the brain, the nerves, muscles and genitals. As people age, testosterone becomes bound to serum globulin and is not available to the cell receptor sites were it is needed to initiate sex stimulating centers in the brain. The component in the blood that renders free testosterone inactive is called sex hormone-binding globulin (SHBG). Excess estrogen can increase the production of SHBG and block testosterone-receptor sites. This means there are two mechanisms by which excess estrogen interferes with sex dive in aging males. For testosterone to produce long-lasting libido enhancing effects, it must be kept in the "free" form in the bloodstream. Bound testosterone is not able to be picked up by testosterone receptors on cell membranes. For aging men, it is desirable to suppress excess levels of SHBG and estrogen while boosting free testosterone to the level of a young man. There is now a natural way of modulating testosterone and estrogen levels in aging men that does not require expensive prescription drugs. Restoring youthful hormone balance can have a significant impact on male sexuality. To reiterate, the hormone modulation objectives that most aging men need to facilitate sexual rejuvenation involves an increase in "free" testosterone coupled by a decrease in both estrogen and SHGD levels. Increasing testosterone by suppressing excess estrogen For many men, a safe and easy way to increase free testosterone is to prevent it from being converted (aromatized) into excess estrogen. Too much estrogen plays havoc with a man's sex life by binding to testosterone receptor sites and may contribute to the over-production of SHBG. SHBG binds free testosterone in a way that makes it unavailable to receptor sites in the brain, nerves and genitals. Estrogen overload is a serious problem in aging men. One report showed that estrogen levels of the average 54-year-old man are higher than those of the average 59-year-old woman. Estrogen is a necessary hormone for men, but too much causes a wide range of health problems. High serum levels of estrogen also trick the brain into thinking that enough testosterone is being produced, thereby slowing the natural production of testosterone. Based on the multiple deleterious effects of excess estrogen in men, aggressive actions should be taken to reduce estrogen to a safe range. To determine if estrogen levels are too high, men are encouraged to have their blood tested for estradiol. If the blood test results show estradiol levels are greater than 30 pg/mL, men should consider radical lifestyle changes, and/or taking an aromatase-inhibiting nutrient or drug. A numerical example of the effects of a nutritional aromatase inhibitor can be seen on one of the subjects in the pilot studies whose initial serum estradiol level was a high 54 and free testosterone a moderately low 14.4. After only 30 days on a nutritional aromatase inhibitor, estradiol levels fell to 36 (from 54) and free testosterone levels increased to 22.5 (from 14.4). In this pilot study, funded by The Life Extension Foundation, 9 of 10 test subjects showed a significant decline in excess estrogen levels when several herbal extracts were combined. These kinds of results show how some men reduce excess estrogen while boosting free testosterone. Herbs and male sexual potency There are herbal extracts that have been shown to either increase or decrease testosterone levels. The New England Journal of Medicine (1998, 339;785-91) showed that an herbal preparation called PC Spes had the dual effect of suppressing testosterone and increasing estrogen and was therefore beneficial in the treatment of prostate cancer. Conversely, herbs that increase free testosterone and suppress excess estrogen are highly desirable for healthy men over age 40 who suffer the premature aging effects of a testosterone deficit, including loss of libido. We discuss some of these herbal extracts here. Chrysin A bioflavonoid called chrysin has shown potential as a natural aromatase-inhibitor. Chrysin can be extracted from various plants. Body builders have used it as a testosterone boosting supplement. The problem with chrysin is that because of its poor absorption into the bloodstream, it has not produced the testosterone enhancing effects users expect. In a study published in Biochemical Pharmacology (1999, Vol.58), the specific mechanisms of chrysin's absorption impairment were identified, which infers that the addition of a pepper extract (piperine) could significantly enhance the bioavailability of chrysin. Pilot studies have found that when chrysin is combined with piperine, reductions in serum estrogen (estradiol) and increases in total and free testosterone result in 30 days. Aromatase-inhibiting drugs are used to treat women with estrogen-dependant breast cancers. The rationale for this therapy is that estrogen is produced by fat cells via a process known as aromatization. Aging men often have excess aromatase enzyme activity, and the result is that too much of their testosterone is "aromatized" into estrogen. In a study published in the Journal of Steroid Biochemical Molecular Biology (1993;Vol 46, No 3), chrysin and 10 other flavonoids were compared to an aromatase-inhibiting drug (aminoglutethimide). The study tested the aromatase-inhibiting effects of these natural flavonoids (such as genistein, rutin, tea catechins, etc.) in human fat cell cultures. Chrysin was the most potent aromatase-inhibitor, and was shown to be similar in potency and effectiveness to the aromatase-inhibiting drug. The scientists conducting the study concluded by stating that the aromatase-inhibiting effects of certain flavonoids may contribute to the cancer preventive effects of plant-based diets. Two recent studies have identified specific mechanisms by which chrysin inhibits aromatase in human cells. These studies demonstrate that chrysin is a more potent inhibitor of the aromatase enzyme than phyto-estrogens and other flavonoids that are known to have aromatase-inhibiting properties (Arch Pharm Res 1999 Jun;22(3):309-12; J Steroid Biochem Mol Biol 1997 Apr;61(3-6):107-15). The purpose of these studies was to ascertain which fruits and vegetables should be included in the diet of postmenopausal women to reduce the incidence of breast cancer. Excess levels of mutagenic forms of estrogen have been linked to a greater risk of breast cancer, and scientists are studying dietary means of naturally reducing levels of these dangerous estrogens. Flavonoids such as chrysin are of considerable interest because they suppress excess estrogen via their aromatase-inhibiting properties. While this cancer preventing effect is most important for women, inhibiting aromatase in aging men has tremendous potential for naturally suppressing excess estrogen while boosting low levels of testosterone to a youthful state. Since chrysin is not a patentable drug, don't expect to see a lot of human research documenting its effects. There are lots of FDA approved drugs that inhibit aromatase (such as Arimidex), and there is not much economic interest in finding natural ways of replacing these drugs. While prescription aromatase-inhibiting drugs are relatively free of side effects, aging men who are seeking to gain control over their sex hormone levels often prefer natural sources, rather than trying to convince a physician to prescribe a drug (such as Arimidex) that is not yet approved by the FDA as an anti-aging therapy. (Arimidex is prescribed to estrogen-dependant breast cancer patients to prevent testosterone and other hormones in the body from converting, i.e. aromatasing, into estrogen.) An advantage to using plant extracts to boost testosterone in lieu of drugs is that the plant extracts have ancillary health benefits. Chrysin, for example, is a potent antioxidant that possesses vitamin-like effects in the body. It has been shown to induce an anti-inflammatory effect, possibly through inhibition of the enzymes 5-lipoxygenase and cyclooxygenase inflammation pathways. Aging is being increasingly viewed as a pro-inflammatory process, and agents that inhibit chronic inflammation may protect against diseases as diverse as atherosclerosis, senility and aortic valve stenosis. Chrysin is one of many flavonoids being studied as a phyto-extract that may prevent some forms of cancer. If chrysin can boost free testosterone in the aging male by inhibiting the aromatase enzyme, this would provide men with a low cost natural supplement that could provide the dual anti-aging benefits of testosterone replacement and aromatase-inhibiting drug therapy. As previously discussed, boosting free testosterone levels can have a dramatic effect on sex drive, performance and satisfaction. Pilot studies indicate that chrysin increases total and free testosterone levels in the majority of men who take it with piperine. Chrysin has one other property that could add to its libido-enhancing potential. A major cause of sexual dissatisfaction among men is work-related stress and anxiety. Another problem some men have is "sexual performance anxiety" that prevents them from being able to achieve erections when they are expected to. In a study published in Pharmacology Biochemistry and Behavior (1994, Vol 47), mice were injected with diazepam (Valium), chrysin or placebo to evaluate the effects these substances had on anxiety and performance levels. Chrysin was shown to produce anti-anxiety effects comparable with diazepam, but without sedation and muscle relaxation. In other words, chrysin produced a relaxing effect in the brain, but with no impairment of motor activity. The mechanism of action of chrysin was compared to diazepam, and it was shown that unlike diazepam, chrysin can reduce anxiety without inducing the common side-effects associated with benzodiazepine drugs. A common problem with benzodiazepine drugs is memory impairment. In a study published in a 1997 issue of Pharmacology Biochemistry and Behavior (Vol 58, No 4), chrysin displayed potent anti-anxiety effects in rats, but did not interfere with cognitive performance. In this study, diazepam was shown to inhibit neurological function, but chrysin (and other anti-anxiety flavonoids) had no effect on training or test session performance. The scientists conducting this study pointed out that chrysin selectively inhibits anxiety in the brain but, unlike diazepam, does not induce the cognitive impairment. Chrysin may therefore offer libido-enhancing effects in the aging male by: - Increasing free testosterone, - Decreasing excess estrogen, - Producing a safe anti-anxiety effect. Chrysin is being sold to body builders by commercial supplement companies that do not know if their product is favorably modulating testosterone and estrogen levels in men. The Life Extension Foundation, on the other hand, has conducted meticulous studies to evaluate the effects of chrysin (combined with piperine to facilitate absorption) on aging men. These studies have produced some impressive preliminary data, and ongoing research will be reported in future issues of Life Extension magazine. Nettle About 90% of testosterone is produced by the testes, the remainder by the adrenal glands. Testosterone functions as an aphrodisiac hormone in brains cells, and as an anabolic hormone in the development of bone and skeletal muscle. But testosterone that becomes bound to serum globulin is not available to cell receptor sites and fails to induce a libido effect. It is, therefore, desirable to increase levels of "free testosterone" in order to ignite sexual arousal in the brain. As discussed already, a hormone that controls levels of free testosterone is called sex hormone-binding globulin (SHBG). When testosterone binds to SHBG, it loses its biological activity and becomes known as "bound testosterone," as opposed to the desirable "free testosterone." As men age past year 45, SHBG's binding capacity increases almost dramatically-by 40% on average-and coincides with the age-associated loss of libido. Some studies show that the decline in sexual interest with advancing age is not always due to the amount of testosterone produced, but rather to the increased binding of testosterone to globulin by SHBG. This explains why some older men who are on testosterone replacement therapy do not report a long-term aphrodisiac effect. That is, the artificially administered testosterone becomes bound by SHBG, and is not bioavailable to cellular receptor sites where it would normally produce a libido-enhancing effect. It should be noted that the liver also causes testosterone to bind to globulin. This liver-induced binding of testosterone is worsened by the use of sedatives, anti-hypertensives, tranquilizers and alcoholic beverages. The overuse of drugs and alcohol could explain why some men do not experience a libido-enhancing effect when consuming drugs and plant-based aphrodisiacs. An interesting review, "How Desire Dies" (Nature, 381/6584, 1996), discusses how frequently prescribed drugs, such as beta-blockers and antidepressants, cause sexual dysfunction. Prescription drugs of all sorts have been linked to inhibition of libido. Logically, one way of increasing libido in older men would be to block the testosterone-binding effects of SHBG. This would leave more testosterone in its free, sexually activating form. A highly concentrated extract from the nettle root provides a unique mechanism for increasing levels of free testosterone. Recent European research has identified constituents of nettle root that bind to SHBG in place of testosterone, thus reducing SHBG's binding of free testosterone. As the authors of one study state, these constituents of nettle root "may influence the blood level of free, i.e. active, steroid hormones by displacing them from the SHBG bindings site." The prostate gland also benefits from nettle root. In Germany, nettle root has been used as a treatment for benign prostatic hyperplasia (enlargement of the prostate gland) for decades. A metabolite of testosterone called dihydrotestosterone (DHT) stimulates prostate growth, leading to enlargement. Nettle root inhibits the binding of DHT to attachment sites on the prostate membrane. Nettle extracts also inhibit enzymes such as 5 alpha reductase that cause testosterone to convert to DHT. It is the DHT metabolite of testosterone that is known to cause benign prostate enlargement, excess facial hair and hair loss at the top of the head. Muira puama French scientists have identified an herbal extract that has shown libido enhancing effects in two human clinical studies. Muira puama comes from the stems and roots of the Ptychopetalum olacoides plant, and is widely used in the Amazon region of South America as an aphrodisiac, tonic and cure for rheumatism and muscle paralysis. Muira puama has been the subject of two published clinical studies conducted by Dr. Jacques Waynberg, an eminent medical sexologist and author of 10 books on the subject. The first study, conducted at the Institute of Sexology in Paris under Waynberg's supervision, was reported in the November 1994 issue of The American Journal of Natural Medicine. The study population consisted of 262 men complaining of lack of sexual desire, or inability to attain or maintain erection. After two weeks, 62 percent of patients with loss of libido rated the treatment as having a dynamic effect, while 52 percent of patients with erectile dysfunction rated the treatment as beneficial. The article goes on to compare muira puama favorably to yohimbine, stating, "Muira puama may provide better results than yohimbine without side effects." Dr. Waynberg's second study, entitled "Male Sexual Asthenia," focused on sexual difficulties associated with asthenia, a deficiency state characterized by fatigue, loss of strength, or debility, all symptoms of a testosterone deficiency. The study population consisted of 100 men over 18 years of age who complained of impotence or loss of libido, or both. A total of 94 men completed the study and were evaluated. Muira puama treatment led to significantly increased frequency of intercourse for 66% of couples. Of the 46 men who complained of loss of desire, 70% reported intensification of libido. The stability of erection during intercourse was restored in 55% of patients and 66% of men reported a reduction in fatigue. Other beneficial effects included improvement in sleep and morning erections. Treatment with muira puama was much more effective in cases with the least psychosomatic involvement. Of the 26 men diagnosed with common sexual asthenia without noticeable sign of psychosomatic disorder, the treatment was effective for asthenia in 100% of cases, the lack of libido in 85% of cases, and for inability of coital erection in 90% of cases. The latter finding confirms that broad tonic action of muira puama on conditions of fatigue and stress related sexual dysfunction. Since muira puama is not an artificial stimulant, it fortifies the system over a period of time. Some men report increased vitality within two weeks, while the full effects build over several weeks. Dr. Waynberg notes that his toxicology studies and observations corroborate the conclusions of the scientific literature on the absence of toxicity of muira puama, which is well tolerated by men in general good health. One of the earliest scientific studies of muira puama was conducted by another French doctor, Dr. Rebourgeon. His research found the plant to be effective in "gastrointestinal and circulatory asthenia as well as impotence." Three of the most respected scientific authorities on medical herbalism recommend muira puama. In newly published books, James Duke, Ph.D., Chief of the United States Department of Agriculture's Medical Plant Laboratory, and Michael Murray, M.D., recommend muira puama for erectile dysfunction or lack of libido. In addition, Daniel Mowrey, Ph.D., states the following in his book Herbal Tonic Therapies (p. 358): Few in number are the plants that seem to have a reliable reputation as true aphrodisiacs. . . . Snake oil remedies abound, and confusion, dishonesty and hyped-up placebo razzmatazz carry the day. Out of this mess, one plant, virtually unknown to most Americans, appears to have risen above the competition. The plant is called muira puama. And though not much is known scientifically about the plant, all indications would lead one to believe that here is a material with the potential for making an important and significant contribution to the health of the male reproductive system. Based on the clinical reports documenting the libido and energy enhancing effects of muira puama, it is possible that this herb induces these positive changes by favorably altering the hormone balance in aging men, i.e. increases free testosterone and/or suppresses excess estrogen. Putting it all together Enhanced sexual enjoyment is of paramount importance to a great many people, increasingly so as we age. An enormous amount of published data documents the libido-enhancing effects that occur when testosterone is restored to a youthful level. Testosterone is much more than a sex hormone. There are testosterone receptor sites in cells throughout the body, most notably in the brain and heart. Youthful protein synthesis for maintaining muscle mass and bone formation requires testosterone. Testosterone improves oxygen uptake throughout the body, helps control blood sugar, regulate cholesterol and maintain immune surveillance. The body requires testosterone to maintain youthful cardiac output and neurological function. Men suffering from depression often have lower levels of testosterone than control subjects. For some men, elevating free testosterone levels could prove to be an effective anti-depressant therapy. There is a scientific basis for free testosterone levels being measured in men suffering from depression and replacement therapy initiated if free testosterone levels are low normal or below normal. One of the most misunderstood hormones is testosterone. Body builders tarnished the reputation of testosterone by putting large amounts of synthetic testosterone drugs into their young bodies. Synthetic testosterone abuse can produce detrimental effects, but this has nothing to do with the benefits a man over age 40 can enjoy by properly restoring his natural testosterone to a youthful level. The many health benefits of hormone modulation therapy in aging men is the subject of these books authored by highly respected medical doctors: Vitality and Potency, by Jonathan V. Wright, M.D. and Lane Lenard, Ph.D. and The Testosterone Syndrome, co-authored by Eugene Shippen, M.D. These books provide meticulous molecular details, along with many case histories relating to the sexual enhancing effects that occur when free testosterone is increased beyond normal "middle-aged" levels. In the November 1999 issue of this publication, an in-depth article described complex pharmaceutical methods of increasing free testosterone using FDA approved drugs. Many members, however, inquired about natural ways of increasing testosterone while suppressing excess estrogen. Ongoing research at The Life Extension Foundation has resulted in several plant extracts being identified that appear to increase free testosterone and suppress excess estrogen in most men. In addition, clinical studies on one of these plant extracts indicates a significant libido-enhancing effect in the majority of men in placebo-controlled trials. Men over age 40 now have the option of using testosterone patches or creams that need to be prescribed by their physician, or they can try a new combination of plant extracts that have shown promising results. Results from published studies continue to substantiate the critical role that testosterone plays in protecting against premature aging. Life Extension magazine readers will be kept informed on scientifically validated testosterone enhancing strategies in future issues. Excess Estrogen and age-associated immune dysfunction It is well known that aging results in the shrinkage of the thymus gland, along with a reduction in the secretion of thymic hormones and T-cells, all of which are essential for maintaining youthful immune synchronization. A study published in the journal Immnological Reviews (1997, Vol 160) showed that excess estrogen may be the primary sex hormone responsible for age-induced thymic involution (shrinkage) and age-associated immune dysfunction. The name of this extensive study was "Thymic Aging and T-Cell Regeneration," and it suggested that hormone modulation was one way of accomplishing thymic regeneration. A chapter from the 1998 textbook Principles and Practices of Geriatric Medicine entitled "Immunity and Aging" also discussed the role sex steroid hormones play in thymic involution. These studies suggest that restoring youthful sex hormone profiles could assist in protecting against immune impairment caused by the shrinking thymus gland. Hormone modulating nutrients: the studies As described in the November 1999 issue of Life Extension magazine, there are testosterone drugs and estrogen suppressing drugs that can be prescribed by your doctor. Understandably, however, some people do not want to use drugs if nutrients can accomplish the same objective. In order to ascertain the safety and efficacy of various nutrients that are purported to modulate male hormone levels, The Life Extension Foundation has been sponsoring clinical studies to assess the effects of specific supplements on blood levels of testosterone, estrogen, SHBG, etc. The results from the first pilot study showed that nine out of 10 men experienced a significant reduction in serum estradiol (estrogen) levels after only thirty days, compared to baseline. In this brief study, total testosterone increased in seven out of 10 men, but free testosterone increased in only four of the 10 men studied. Other blood parameters were not statistically altered. A more comprehensive study incorporating a different combination of nutrients resulted in 8 out of 8 men experiencing increases in free testosterone while levels of the undesirable SHBG declined in seven out of eight men, compared to baseline. Estrogen and other blood parameters were not significantly altered in this study. A third study was undertaken to evaluate still another combination of nutrients. It revealed that after thirty days, 12 out of 17 men experienced an increase in total testosterone and 11 out of 17 showed an increase in free testosterone, compared to baseline. Again, other blood parameters were not significantly altered. Clinical trials are ongoing, and are expected to continue into early year 2000. Medical Testing For the average male over age 40, increasing free testosterone can restore the sexual fire of youth. The only downside to increasing free testosterone levels to those of a healthy 21-year-old is the potential effects it may have on men with prostate cancer. Before embarking on a testosterone-enhancement program a baseline blood PSA test and a digital rectal exam taken to rule out existing prostate cancer. When using testosterone drugs, PSA blood tests should be taken every 30-45 days for the first five months to rule out hidden prostate cancer. When using slower acting testosterone boosting nutritional supplements, PSA testing can be reduced to every 60-90 days for the first eight months. Remember, the preponderance of the published literature shows that increasing free testosterone does not increase the risk of cancer in healthy men, but those with existing prostate cancer should avoid testosterone boosting drugs and supplements.
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Friday, February 8, 2008
just special fotos
My name is Deanna Despot and I Produce "Your Money's Worth." Ryan Tomlinson wanted me to touch base with you abouy your in-studio radio interview on Fortune Market’s “Your Money’s Worth” on 97.1 KLSX-FM this Saturday,February 9th at 9:00 a.m. with an arrival time at 8:45 a.m. We'll have John Hutchinson call in too at 8:55 a.m. for the 9:00 a.m. interview. The number to the studio line for John to call in is 8xxxxxxxxxxxx (please don't give this number out to others). Your Money’s Worth is Co-hosted by Deanna Despot (me), Michelle Parisi and Ryan Tomlinson.
97.1 KLSX-FM is located at 5670 Wilshire Blvd., (Cross street is Hauser), Suite 205 in
Los Angeles (90036). The building is open but elevator access isn’t granted to the public so please park on the street (parking structure is automated with no validation only credit card usage) so feel free to park on the street on Hauser (meters apply to Saturday so you may need change) or down the residential street is free parking (2 hours).
Once you park…please go to the elevators in the parking structure and go to P2 (second floor and cross the mezzanine as this is the back/employee entrance) and call the KLSX warm line at xxxxxxxxxxxxx to ask the phone op to let you in.
“Your Money’s Worth” airs live every Saturday morning from 8a.m.-10a.m. and streams live on www.fortunemarket.net and www.971freefm.com (shows are archived too).
I don't have your number so could you please call me at 310xxxxxxxxxxx as I'll be stepping out for a few and checking my email tonight.
As I said, it still needs more fixing. ;-)
I just fiddle with it each time I read it.
___________________________________________________________________
Thursday, December 07, 2006
READ THE 3 RULES I LIVE BY
Imagine yourself on a warm summer day, strolling down the sidewalk of your favorite city, slow and serene. Just you and your thoughts. Just you and the smells of the shops and restaurants that you pass. Just you and the sound of traffic. Just you and the strangers around you, behind you, beside you, toward you.
You feel calm, like a rock in the middle of a stream, as the people part and flow around you. You feel the warmth of the sun on your face and you are glad you have nowhere to be and nothing in particular that needs your attention. You are not doing anything. You are just... being.
The air is alive, electric. Possibilities are everywhere and you breathe deeply, absorbing the smells and the sights and the sounds.
And then... you see her.
She is casually walking toward you, stopping occasionally to look in shop windows, and she is beautiful to you. She wears a simple dress, unadorned and soft, floating about her as she moves, with the sunlight shining through it, tracing her shape, her form. It's that kind of dress.
Time slows down and you catch your breath. She is getting closer, unaware that you are watching her, absorbed in her own reverie, window shopping. It is obvious she is not in a hurry. And now she is even closer.
Here's the question: what will you do?
What will you do?
You know exactly what you want to do. You want to stop her as she is about to pass and say something charming and confident. You want to smile and ask her name. You want to ask her to join you for coffee around the corner. And if she joins you for coffee, you want her to sit with you, fully attentive, enthralled by your easy manner and compelling conversation, as you regale her with stories and fun and witty repartee. You want her to be so intrigued by you that she offers you her phone number - without you even asking. And then you want to call her tonight! And the next night. And the next. You want to tell her she is beautiful to you, and that you can't wait to see her again.
You want to do all those things.
But you can't. You can't... because you are afraid.
You are afraid that if you try to stop her and say hello, she will smile a weak smile at you and then keep going. Or she will ignore you. Or she will shake her head and avert her eyes and duck around you.
You are afraid that if she does stop and she does tell you her name, then you will draw a blank, and you will look foolish and awkward as you desperately try to think of something interesting to say.
You are afraid that even if you don't draw a blank and you manage to engage her in some semblance of conversation and you ask her to join you for coffee, she will decline and say she has a boyfriend. Or she will laugh at you. Or she will look you dead in the eye and say, "No, not interested." And walk away.
You are afraid that even if she does agree to join you for coffee that, well, maybe she is just bored and has nothing better to do. Besides, you certainly are not her type anyway. After all, you are sure you are too short for her and you are sure she likes a different hair color than yours and you are sure you aren't good looking enough for her.
And then even if she appears to like you, and she does ask you to call her and she gives you her number, then you are afraid you will have no idea what to do with it. Should you call her right away? Should you wait three days? A week? You have no idea.
And then even if you do manage to get up enough courage to call her, how should you act? How should you sound? Should your tone be upbeat, fun and carefree, or suave, assured and direct? Or should you just be yourself? And, for that matter, how do you be yourself anyway? Why would she ever be interested in you being yourself?
And finally, if do you compliment her and tell her she looks beautiful today in her simple dress that floats about her when she moves, then you are afraid she will view it as supplication. No, you can't compliment her. Instead, you must act distant and cool and aloof and uninterested, because if you don't, she will think that you are needy and clingy and too available. You hate acting like that - why can't you just be natural and real and not play these games? Ah, but if you don't, you are sure you will lose.
And there you have it. She is almost upon you now, but it doesn't matter because in a fraction of a second, your mind has conjured up all of these negative scenarios.
And so as she passes by, all you manage to put together is a thin-lipped smile and a nod in her direction and, well... she may or may not have noticed; you can't really tell. And it makes you very sad.
Well, you are not alone.
This is how most men live their lives: they spend their time watching her pass by. They fail to act, letting what could possibly be the most fulfilling romantic encounter they have ever experienced quietly pass them by.
It is all because of our deepest fear: the fear of rejection.
In today's society, a man feels that if a woman rejects him in any way - however politely and kindly she does it - she has somehow invalidated his very masculinity. He can't help but feel that she is indirectly rejecting him as a man. He simply isn't good enough for her. And by extension, he is not good enough for anyone - including himself.
It doesn't matter what her reasons are - she might be sad today, or not feeling pretty, or newly broken up with her boyfriend, or happily married, or frustrated with her career or her life... or whatever. He still takes it personally.
Even the most confident of men among us - those used to being constantly in the company of women - get rejected now and then; they still feel a twinge of hesitation when they encounter a woman that takes their breath away.
The fear of rejection is a man's deepest fear, and it causes him to hesitate, to catch himself, to pause with that oh-so familiar sinking feeling in his stomach. In other words, without her even saying a single word to him or even noticing him at all, he has already rejected himself.
She doesn't have to reject him because he has already done it for her.
The truth is, the fear of rejection is ingrained in all of us, including her. We have been conditioned by society to believe that we simply aren't good enough. It feels natural to us that others will reject us because we have lived with the fear of rejection our whole lives. We wear this fear around us like a blanket; we have grown accustomed to it.
In addition, the root of most of the problems in our relationships is our fundamental fear of rejection. For even in a seemingly stable and otherwise happy relationship, the latent fear of rejection can simmer just beneath the surface, manifesting itself occasionally (or often) in acts of jealousy or anger or selfishness or petty arguments.
We are born with only one fear: the fear of loud noises. All other fears are acquired as we move through life. When we were four years old, we all could sing. When we were four years old, we all could draw. But then we started to go to school and for the first time, we began to compare ourselves to others. We looked over at another kid's drawing and for the first time, we felt that maybe we couldn't draw.
Society has ingrained in our consciousness the notion that we might not be as good as someone else. Or, equally common, our parents conveyed to us through their words or their actions from an early age that we simply were not good enough.
Men spend their lives trying to compensate for this perceived lack of value. They try to wear the right clothes, get the right job, drive the right car; all in an attempt to distract her. We hope that maybe she won't notice - and ultimately reject - the real us.
So here we are today: men fear women because they feel that she has the power... the power to validate them. To most men, if a woman agrees to see them or date them or marry them or love them, it gives him value. He feels like a man, like someone has accepted who he is. Unfortunately, he feels the reverse is also true: after all, if she rejects him by not agreeing to any of these things, then is she not invalidating him?
One of the saddest phrases for a man to hear from a woman is, "Don't take this personally, but..." She may sincerely not want to hurt him, but in reality, a man can't help but take it personally.
What happens is this: he feels the rejection, polite or not, as a direct invalidation of his very soul. It sends a man into paroxysms of self examination. "Why?" he asks, "What is it about me that she didn't like? Am I not tall enough? Charming enough? What did I do? What didn't I do? Why?"
And the cycle repeats.
I once saw a sign in a hotel lobby in Vienna (of all places) that said this: "If you could see yourself the way others see you, you would be amazed." I thought about that sign for a long time, and you should too. For if you do, you will discover that it truly is the answer to the fear of rejection.
Always remember that no matter what the outcome, no matter how she responds to you, you are still you! You never lose. Never forget this, for it is the key to overcoming your fear of rejection.
And then... do it anyway. Even successful, confident speakers and performers get butterflies just before they go onstage. It is natural. The difference is that they do it anyway. They don't fail to act. They don't necessarily have less fear of rejection than the rest of us; instead they take a deep breath, steel themselves, and do it anyway - in spite of their fear.
Success breeds confidence and confidence, as we know, breeds success.
So the next time you see her, don't hesitate. Instead, approach her with a smile, knowing in your heart that she too is afraid of rejection, that she too is nervous about how she appears.
Don't reject yourself on her behalf - before you have even met her! Acknowledge your fear, and then do it anyway.
Remember: No matter what happens, you are still you. You never lose!
Zan
Copyright © 2006 Alabaster Communications Inc
Next Article
posted by John Hutchison at 11:11 PM 1 comments links to this post
I TOTALLY LIVE BY THESE RULES
What does it mean? When you hear the word Seduction, what images swim into your view?
Unfortunately, there are those of us who think it has something to do with finding ways to convince a woman to drop her resistance long enough for us to have sex with her (before she changes her mind).
So we try all kinds of things to "seduce" her, hoping to stumble upon something that works. We click all over the screen in frustration, trying to push all her buttons and levers in the correct sequence - like some bizarre version of the game Myst. It is a lot of work, but worth it if we manage to "get lucky". After all, this is seduction!
Well, this is dead wrong.
This is not seduction. This is manipulation.
So what is seduction then? Dictionaries generally have two definitions for the word:
1. The act of leading astray
2. Something that attracts or charms
What I am talking about is the second definition. Looked at in this light - something that attracts or charms - there is a quiet beauty in the notion of seduction.
The truth is, women WANT to be seduced. Do you know what women think about when they hear the word seduction? They think of torch lights and tangos, sand and sarongs - that's what women think about!
Women everywhere are starved for seduction, for passion, for romance.
I believe that seduction is the number one element we are missing in all of our interactions with women today. It is the missing ingredient in all our relationships. It doesn't matter if you just met her five minutes ago, or if you've been married to her for 30 years. Women, all women, will still respond to the same things they have always responded to.
I am often asked in interviews to describe the concept of Enlightened Seduction in one sentence. Well, the phrase that comes closest to the essence of what I do is this: I teach men that women are beautiful...
Now, that might sound like nothing more than idealistic and florid rhetoric - especially in our modern age of cynicism and mistrust - but the truth is, when you start to believe that women are beautiful, they will start to believe it too.
It is that one core belief that separates true lovers of women from pickup artists, one night stand cowboys, and heartbreakers with a whole bouquet of empty promises. In fact, with that mindset, all things are possible with women, and they will open themselves up to you in amazing ways.
This has nothing to do with masking your desires as a man or positioning yourself as the "nice guy". Women know right away what I am all about. Even though I am friends with all women, they would never place me in the "let's just be friends" category.
Always remember that women are complicit in their own seduction. They WANT to be seduced. A common theme I hear from women all the time is the feeling they have that there are no longer any real men.
So here's the thing: discovering the secrets of women, and learning about the kinds of things they universally respond to, is very powerful. It is truly the only thing that works with women! It is the only way to have exceptional women in your life on a consistent basis - women who can't stop thinking about you... who dream about you when you are not around.
These are the kinds of things that "Naturals" have known for centuries. Naturals are men who are at ease in the land of women. And a woman will always respond to a Natural because he shares in her secrets. She simply can't help it.
Zan
Copyright © 2006 Alabaster Communications Inc
posted by John Hutchison at 11:06 PM 0 comments links to this post
I TOTALY LIVE BY THESE RULES
Every true lover knows that the secret to his power over women lies in the power they have over him.
He is a friend to women. He is delighted by the way they flow through life and the way they occupy the world. Their essence enamors and enchants him, and in return he can't help but celebrate them.
He is a romantic; he believes in love, and his love is complete, absolute. He is a slave to his love of women. There is no room for misogyny, no hint of presumption, no toxicity of manipulation.
He knows that women can sense immediately when they are in the presence of a man who likes women, who thinks they are beautiful, who makes them feel lovely, who delights in them. He genuinely likes women, and men that like women are liked by women.
He feels no need to validate himself to other men by bragging about his exploits. He never kisses and tells. Ever. His encounters with women are never about bolstering his own self-esteem or adding another notch to his bedpost. It is all about respect.
It is never about taking something for himself, but always about sharing something with her. For he knows that all experiences in life are amplified once they are shared.
His biggest fear is to be perceived as just another man; he is not like other men, nor does he aspire to be.
If he thought for a moment that she regretted her encounter with him in any way, or somehow felt sad or hurt because of him, it would break his heart. He can't bear the thought that a woman would ever feel she was manipulated by him.
And yet he doesn't mask his desires as a man. He never portrays indifference or apathy in an attempt to sneak under the radar. Instead he embraces his sexuality, presents it to her without presumption, is delighted if she responds favorably but deeply respectful if she does not.
He enters every one of his romantic adventures with newness and excitement, like his first love all over again. He knows that the impact he makes on her, and that she makes on him, will resonate with both of them for years.
And will he be hurt? Will he feel the pangs of loss when it ends? Of course. But he loves it all just the same.
He lives his life believing that every interaction in life is, in essence, a seduction. And so he assumes a woman is always interested. It might be a false assumption, of course, but it is a pleasant assumption, and so it is the way he has chosen to live his life.
He never defends himself when accused of being a player. He knows the truth: that he never plays with a woman's emotions. He is at peace with himself.
And so he makes no attempt at apology or justification for the way he is; he desires neither empathy nor absolution, nor even, for that matter, understanding. He has no need to defend himself because women are his greatest defenders.
Instead he believes his intentions are pure and mutually desired. He is genuine and honest, maybe the most honest man she has ever met. And women have demonstrated over and over to him that honesty is the best aphrodisiac.
And to him, they are all his girls. Every woman is his woman. He has immense compassion for women. He sees their sadness and their loss, their faded dreams, their dead and dying relationships, their stultifying careers and responsibilities, and he makes it his mission to impart beauty to their life again.
Yes, he has been created by women, formed by them, and inspired by them.
He shares in their secrets...
Zan
Copyright © 2006 Alabaster Communications Inc
"... The manifesto of a lover. It is crystallized and fine, honest and smooth like a polished diamond..." --
posted by John Hutchison at 11:01 PM 0 comments links to this post
Sunday, December 24, 2006
RULES OF LOVE WHAT I FEEL
I would rather die then not be able to open my heart to a lady there's no life in fame fortune power ego its all false hoods and empty walls I have walked plaves been places been in places lived like no man has ever walked or dared to walk or had courage to walk ; I am super healthy and not my age biologically or really mentally as I feel life so very strong I can get hurt easy but if I amnot allowed to love as i keep dreaming of then i will forever leave this world soon as i choose fit I fear not death at all ; I have perhaps lived several full lives ; we all make our own self made purgatories ; we all have those dark places we hide those skeletons in dare never to reveal I must truly love again with my heart or surely perish I have seen things in nature and sciences and life that perhaps nobody has seen I don't know I have seen life within insane asylums I have seen and done impossible things and I have loved the best is I have loved if I cannot express this then I leave ; as true burning love makes life truly enjoyable a bonding of 2 souls for me this Christmas is bleak but I keep up the energy to make others happy why because I understand what I feel ; rantings of a madman or hopeless romantic ; maybe but historically love is the greatest of emotions wars have been fought over a lady over love I know I have been there wars within our minds are sometimes the greatest I only ask the universe to love again is that bad ???????? Christmas eve 2006 over and out john Hutchinson
posted by John Hutchison at 8:32 PM 0 comments links to this post
RULES OF TRUE LOVE
our last picture together a few years ago before she went to India we met in 1988 full fires of love burned within us both ;hottest love ever ; well I could not follow her there ; India ; this picture taken in Sherman oaks my lesson in searching for someone to open my heart again is that one has to finalize a love like ours so I fucked up a few relationships like with Corinne a beautiful soul she is and a few others self realizations but now for awhile since 2000 about 2 years ago I let yin go we are still friends but now my heart again is wide open for a wife forever and a day but guarded a bit as I don't know certain things that are real or are not the floodgates of fires of love will open to forever engulf you
posted by John Hutchison at 8:10 PM 0 comments links to this post
www.cynnpr.blogspot.com
of all the souls I have known she is the most human I have ever encountered I truly want my angels to guide her threw this now my Christmas will be on duty for her and her family thank you
posted by John Hutchison at 12:35 AM 0 comments links to this post
http://johnkhutchison.blogspot.com/2006/11/don-juan-said-does-this-path-have.html
Saturday, November 18, 2006
DON JUAN SAID DOES THIS PATH HAVE A HEART ?
more pictures of the place one of my mentors or heroes don Juan said each path is one of only a million paths you must keep in mind a path is just a path if you feel you must follow it you need not stay with it under any circumstances ;any path is only a path. There's no affront to yourself or others in dropping it if that what your heart tells you to do, but your decision to keep on the path or to leave it must be free of ambition and fear . I warn you ; look at every path closely and deliberately . try it as many times you think necessary ;then ask yourself and yourself alone ne question. is this . does this path have a heart . all paths are the same they lead nowhere . they are paths going threw the brush or under it ,does this path have a heart is the only question . if it does then the path is good , if it does not it is of no use ,if your path is love the goal is truly unimportant the process will have heart indeed you can only be real on your own path by straying from yourself you must get closer and closer to what you are always find you in love each man is his own personal challenge I have always chosen the path with a heart I see no logic in hatred or manipulation if I die along I guess I will until then I am me searching the voids on waiting on the edge of forever and I always will be me
http://johnkhutchison.blogspot.com/2006/11/love-power-of-million-suns.html
Saturday, November 18, 2006
LOVE THE POWER OF A MILLION SUNS
We need others . We need others to love and we need to be loved by them ..There's no doubt that without it .we to ,like the infant left alone would cease to develop choose madness and even death and to say further love is always open arms .if you close your arms about love you will find that your only holding only to yourself further to say real love always creates . it never destroys . in this leis mans only promise
http://johnkhutchison.blogspot.com/2006/11/love-paths.html
Sunday, November 19, 2006
LOVE PATHS
Writing: Really I rarely do it, dark skies heavy rain. hum rather in reflective mode rolf; well past my 15 month adventure; in reality makes one fly over the koos nest a picnic, they have no ideas on what goes on, back on topics by of Caelos Casenedas the teachings of Don Juans wisdom stuff I read along time ago;
Yes I have loved many woman and they will never forget it as well as I; and as long as I am with that lady I am indeed faithful, as I focus all my empathic energy into her; as well as many other things; morhicogenic fields; Don't forget my studies are advanced life extension. and life forces. So any lady who says yes I am with forever and a day;
My ex recommend me to others one lady wrote an article I forwarded to scientists Col. John Alexander; as it's a unusual case of energy transference; Hey john you collect guns; yes I collect them more for engineering and history I make my own also; I fear not death; I have fought in many wars; I will go to the cannons if our freedom is at stake; I treasure our soldiers out there on many great wars;
But hum my favorite topic on this gloomy day remember Don Juan as saying a path is just a path there are million of paths .all paths are the same they lead nowhere; they go into bushes over bushes but one has heart the other does not. .I choose myself the path with a heart. ok
Love then recognizes needs physical and emotional .It sees as well as it looks. Listens while it hears. Love touches fondles and revels in sensual gratification. Love is free and cannot be realized unless its left free. Love finds its own path. Sets its own pace and travels in its own way. Love recognizes and appreciates its uniqueness. Love needs no recognition, for its effects are is recognizable it is not true love at all. ok folks - man woman men he knows he must trust and believe in love for it's the only approach to love. Yet if he expresses his trust and belief, society doesn't hesitate to abuse him and take him for a fool.
Love and the practices of the real world seem at odds, miles apart. It is no wander so many few folks do not have the courage to bridge the gap for in practice the gaps seams unbridgeable, social engineering hopeless romantic or other labels. man has on one hand the understanding and drives for growing into love. But society makes this knowledge difficult in practice. So folks find it easier to put aside love. . And join forces with society in questioning its supposed realityŠ. I myself seek no power; yet ill protect those I love at all costs and lend hands in injustices I am not into pretending to me macho as it's a waste of energy .yet ill do very daring and dangerous things; as seen on video rolf he. when forces say no I say yes;
As I see all the ridiculous junk. Walls folks put up to protect themselves; gee some folks get lost on there paths and bury there existence with ego; or how important they are but in reality it's a child seeking something but not understanding why; maybe the lost love long forgotten in layers of self misinformation;
Some take to drugs or booze; believe in you as you're but one special human; my scientist buddies are always frustrated at me; they think I should be this weird character on a path of great determination to prove something. In reality machines fascinate me as well as buildings and navy ships why naval ships. The best of engineered things plus I love adventure and love making. Gee I am sorry I am no scientist; a discover perhaps; but little time I do spend in anti gravity hardly any really but given a challenge ill do it; why because its impossible to most folks; nothing is impossible; so ill do it but not like a crazed madman in some laboratory but in all aspects of life, love, and engineering; sure folks have made millions off of me; oh john is nuts but hey we got credentials; or it could be media stuff; I don't worry about it as its there path and in the end did they walk the path with a heart?
I have several job opportunities one is with USA pentagon. NASA or the retired government guys the knights temporal group or ram group; then Hollywood; threw Hollywood new things can be brought to our kids and folks hum but the path must have a heart; ramblings of a mad man perhaps from your point of view its al relative right; well onward I walk throwing information your way;
Man's function is to unfold his true self. equal to this function is helping others to be strong. and to perfect themselves as unique individualsŠ he will do this best by affording all persons the opportunity to show their feelings, express there aspirations, and share there dreams; for the world is hollow and I have touched the sky; he must see the forces labeled evil. as emanating from suffering people who like himself are human and in the process of attempting to perfect there beings gee we know a few; he must combat these forces of evil through an active love which is deeply concerned and interested in each person quest for self discoveryŠ
He must believe its not the world that is ugly. bitter and destructive, but it what man has done to the world that makes it appear so Š he must be a model. not a model of perfection. a state often not often reached by man but a model human being .for being a good human for being a good human being is the best he or she can beŠ. He must be able forgive himself for being less then perfect Š
He or she must understand change is inevitable, and when it is directed in love and self realization, is always good he or she must be convinced that behavior .to be learned must be tried out; to be is to do ŠWe start getting interesting in saying he or she or whoever. must learn that he or she cannot be loved by all. That's the ideal. In a world of men woman it is not often found. he. She or he can is the finest plum in the world. Ripe juicy succulent and offer himself to all, but we must remember that. that there will be folks who don't like plumbs Šshe he must understand that if she or he is the worlds finest plum, and someone's he loves does not like plums .he or she has the choice of becoming a banana. but she or he must is warned in choosing to becoming a banana. he she will be a second rate banana, but she or he can always be the best plum ŠHe she must realize that if she or he chooses to be a second rate banana .he she runs the risk of the loved one finding he or she second best and wanting only the best, discarding him or her well she or he can then spend there life trying to become the best banana which is inpossable if he or she is a plumb -----or he or she can seek again to be the best plum he or she must endeavuor to love all folks even if your not loved by them . he does not love to be loved he or she loves to love. she he must reject no person for she he realizes that we are part of the whole and to reflect one man or woman is to reject himself Š
He or she must know that he or she loves all and is rejected by one .she or he must not pull away in fear, pain, disappointment, or anger. Its not the others fault. He or she was not ready for what was offered, love was not offered to her or him with conditions. He or she gave love because he or she was fortunate enough to have it to give. and because he felt joy in the giving and not what he or she would receive in return Š understand that if he or she is rejected in one love ok. there are hundreds of others waiting love, the idea that there is but one right love is deception. There are many right loves; hey it turned sunny out there; some romances marriages. I will love you as long as I can help you grow in love wise words; for real love is dedicated to continual becoming.
When for any reason this process ceases love becomes tedious, listless, and is doomed to fade away. To let down those walls and always forever young a relationship must be. Nothing is impossible and problems can be dealt with. Exploration of intimacy again, full circle, empathic between the two, as oneŠ
I just fiddle with it each time I read it.
___________________________________________________________________
Thursday, December 07, 2006
READ THE 3 RULES I LIVE BY
Imagine yourself on a warm summer day, strolling down the sidewalk of your favorite city, slow and serene. Just you and your thoughts. Just you and the smells of the shops and restaurants that you pass. Just you and the sound of traffic. Just you and the strangers around you, behind you, beside you, toward you.
You feel calm, like a rock in the middle of a stream, as the people part and flow around you. You feel the warmth of the sun on your face and you are glad you have nowhere to be and nothing in particular that needs your attention. You are not doing anything. You are just... being.
The air is alive, electric. Possibilities are everywhere and you breathe deeply, absorbing the smells and the sights and the sounds.
And then... you see her.
She is casually walking toward you, stopping occasionally to look in shop windows, and she is beautiful to you. She wears a simple dress, unadorned and soft, floating about her as she moves, with the sunlight shining through it, tracing her shape, her form. It's that kind of dress.
Time slows down and you catch your breath. She is getting closer, unaware that you are watching her, absorbed in her own reverie, window shopping. It is obvious she is not in a hurry. And now she is even closer.
Here's the question: what will you do?
What will you do?
You know exactly what you want to do. You want to stop her as she is about to pass and say something charming and confident. You want to smile and ask her name. You want to ask her to join you for coffee around the corner. And if she joins you for coffee, you want her to sit with you, fully attentive, enthralled by your easy manner and compelling conversation, as you regale her with stories and fun and witty repartee. You want her to be so intrigued by you that she offers you her phone number - without you even asking. And then you want to call her tonight! And the next night. And the next. You want to tell her she is beautiful to you, and that you can't wait to see her again.
You want to do all those things.
But you can't. You can't... because you are afraid.
You are afraid that if you try to stop her and say hello, she will smile a weak smile at you and then keep going. Or she will ignore you. Or she will shake her head and avert her eyes and duck around you.
You are afraid that if she does stop and she does tell you her name, then you will draw a blank, and you will look foolish and awkward as you desperately try to think of something interesting to say.
You are afraid that even if you don't draw a blank and you manage to engage her in some semblance of conversation and you ask her to join you for coffee, she will decline and say she has a boyfriend. Or she will laugh at you. Or she will look you dead in the eye and say, "No, not interested." And walk away.
You are afraid that even if she does agree to join you for coffee that, well, maybe she is just bored and has nothing better to do. Besides, you certainly are not her type anyway. After all, you are sure you are too short for her and you are sure she likes a different hair color than yours and you are sure you aren't good looking enough for her.
And then even if she appears to like you, and she does ask you to call her and she gives you her number, then you are afraid you will have no idea what to do with it. Should you call her right away? Should you wait three days? A week? You have no idea.
And then even if you do manage to get up enough courage to call her, how should you act? How should you sound? Should your tone be upbeat, fun and carefree, or suave, assured and direct? Or should you just be yourself? And, for that matter, how do you be yourself anyway? Why would she ever be interested in you being yourself?
And finally, if do you compliment her and tell her she looks beautiful today in her simple dress that floats about her when she moves, then you are afraid she will view it as supplication. No, you can't compliment her. Instead, you must act distant and cool and aloof and uninterested, because if you don't, she will think that you are needy and clingy and too available. You hate acting like that - why can't you just be natural and real and not play these games? Ah, but if you don't, you are sure you will lose.
And there you have it. She is almost upon you now, but it doesn't matter because in a fraction of a second, your mind has conjured up all of these negative scenarios.
And so as she passes by, all you manage to put together is a thin-lipped smile and a nod in her direction and, well... she may or may not have noticed; you can't really tell. And it makes you very sad.
Well, you are not alone.
This is how most men live their lives: they spend their time watching her pass by. They fail to act, letting what could possibly be the most fulfilling romantic encounter they have ever experienced quietly pass them by.
It is all because of our deepest fear: the fear of rejection.
In today's society, a man feels that if a woman rejects him in any way - however politely and kindly she does it - she has somehow invalidated his very masculinity. He can't help but feel that she is indirectly rejecting him as a man. He simply isn't good enough for her. And by extension, he is not good enough for anyone - including himself.
It doesn't matter what her reasons are - she might be sad today, or not feeling pretty, or newly broken up with her boyfriend, or happily married, or frustrated with her career or her life... or whatever. He still takes it personally.
Even the most confident of men among us - those used to being constantly in the company of women - get rejected now and then; they still feel a twinge of hesitation when they encounter a woman that takes their breath away.
The fear of rejection is a man's deepest fear, and it causes him to hesitate, to catch himself, to pause with that oh-so familiar sinking feeling in his stomach. In other words, without her even saying a single word to him or even noticing him at all, he has already rejected himself.
She doesn't have to reject him because he has already done it for her.
The truth is, the fear of rejection is ingrained in all of us, including her. We have been conditioned by society to believe that we simply aren't good enough. It feels natural to us that others will reject us because we have lived with the fear of rejection our whole lives. We wear this fear around us like a blanket; we have grown accustomed to it.
In addition, the root of most of the problems in our relationships is our fundamental fear of rejection. For even in a seemingly stable and otherwise happy relationship, the latent fear of rejection can simmer just beneath the surface, manifesting itself occasionally (or often) in acts of jealousy or anger or selfishness or petty arguments.
We are born with only one fear: the fear of loud noises. All other fears are acquired as we move through life. When we were four years old, we all could sing. When we were four years old, we all could draw. But then we started to go to school and for the first time, we began to compare ourselves to others. We looked over at another kid's drawing and for the first time, we felt that maybe we couldn't draw.
Society has ingrained in our consciousness the notion that we might not be as good as someone else. Or, equally common, our parents conveyed to us through their words or their actions from an early age that we simply were not good enough.
Men spend their lives trying to compensate for this perceived lack of value. They try to wear the right clothes, get the right job, drive the right car; all in an attempt to distract her. We hope that maybe she won't notice - and ultimately reject - the real us.
So here we are today: men fear women because they feel that she has the power... the power to validate them. To most men, if a woman agrees to see them or date them or marry them or love them, it gives him value. He feels like a man, like someone has accepted who he is. Unfortunately, he feels the reverse is also true: after all, if she rejects him by not agreeing to any of these things, then is she not invalidating him?
One of the saddest phrases for a man to hear from a woman is, "Don't take this personally, but..." She may sincerely not want to hurt him, but in reality, a man can't help but take it personally.
What happens is this: he feels the rejection, polite or not, as a direct invalidation of his very soul. It sends a man into paroxysms of self examination. "Why?" he asks, "What is it about me that she didn't like? Am I not tall enough? Charming enough? What did I do? What didn't I do? Why?"
And the cycle repeats.
I once saw a sign in a hotel lobby in Vienna (of all places) that said this: "If you could see yourself the way others see you, you would be amazed." I thought about that sign for a long time, and you should too. For if you do, you will discover that it truly is the answer to the fear of rejection.
Always remember that no matter what the outcome, no matter how she responds to you, you are still you! You never lose. Never forget this, for it is the key to overcoming your fear of rejection.
And then... do it anyway. Even successful, confident speakers and performers get butterflies just before they go onstage. It is natural. The difference is that they do it anyway. They don't fail to act. They don't necessarily have less fear of rejection than the rest of us; instead they take a deep breath, steel themselves, and do it anyway - in spite of their fear.
Success breeds confidence and confidence, as we know, breeds success.
So the next time you see her, don't hesitate. Instead, approach her with a smile, knowing in your heart that she too is afraid of rejection, that she too is nervous about how she appears.
Don't reject yourself on her behalf - before you have even met her! Acknowledge your fear, and then do it anyway.
Remember: No matter what happens, you are still you. You never lose!
Zan
Copyright © 2006 Alabaster Communications Inc
Next Article
posted by John Hutchison at 11:11 PM 1 comments links to this post
I TOTALLY LIVE BY THESE RULES
What does it mean? When you hear the word Seduction, what images swim into your view?
Unfortunately, there are those of us who think it has something to do with finding ways to convince a woman to drop her resistance long enough for us to have sex with her (before she changes her mind).
So we try all kinds of things to "seduce" her, hoping to stumble upon something that works. We click all over the screen in frustration, trying to push all her buttons and levers in the correct sequence - like some bizarre version of the game Myst. It is a lot of work, but worth it if we manage to "get lucky". After all, this is seduction!
Well, this is dead wrong.
This is not seduction. This is manipulation.
So what is seduction then? Dictionaries generally have two definitions for the word:
1. The act of leading astray
2. Something that attracts or charms
What I am talking about is the second definition. Looked at in this light - something that attracts or charms - there is a quiet beauty in the notion of seduction.
The truth is, women WANT to be seduced. Do you know what women think about when they hear the word seduction? They think of torch lights and tangos, sand and sarongs - that's what women think about!
Women everywhere are starved for seduction, for passion, for romance.
I believe that seduction is the number one element we are missing in all of our interactions with women today. It is the missing ingredient in all our relationships. It doesn't matter if you just met her five minutes ago, or if you've been married to her for 30 years. Women, all women, will still respond to the same things they have always responded to.
I am often asked in interviews to describe the concept of Enlightened Seduction in one sentence. Well, the phrase that comes closest to the essence of what I do is this: I teach men that women are beautiful...
Now, that might sound like nothing more than idealistic and florid rhetoric - especially in our modern age of cynicism and mistrust - but the truth is, when you start to believe that women are beautiful, they will start to believe it too.
It is that one core belief that separates true lovers of women from pickup artists, one night stand cowboys, and heartbreakers with a whole bouquet of empty promises. In fact, with that mindset, all things are possible with women, and they will open themselves up to you in amazing ways.
This has nothing to do with masking your desires as a man or positioning yourself as the "nice guy". Women know right away what I am all about. Even though I am friends with all women, they would never place me in the "let's just be friends" category.
Always remember that women are complicit in their own seduction. They WANT to be seduced. A common theme I hear from women all the time is the feeling they have that there are no longer any real men.
So here's the thing: discovering the secrets of women, and learning about the kinds of things they universally respond to, is very powerful. It is truly the only thing that works with women! It is the only way to have exceptional women in your life on a consistent basis - women who can't stop thinking about you... who dream about you when you are not around.
These are the kinds of things that "Naturals" have known for centuries. Naturals are men who are at ease in the land of women. And a woman will always respond to a Natural because he shares in her secrets. She simply can't help it.
Zan
Copyright © 2006 Alabaster Communications Inc
posted by John Hutchison at 11:06 PM 0 comments links to this post
I TOTALY LIVE BY THESE RULES
Every true lover knows that the secret to his power over women lies in the power they have over him.
He is a friend to women. He is delighted by the way they flow through life and the way they occupy the world. Their essence enamors and enchants him, and in return he can't help but celebrate them.
He is a romantic; he believes in love, and his love is complete, absolute. He is a slave to his love of women. There is no room for misogyny, no hint of presumption, no toxicity of manipulation.
He knows that women can sense immediately when they are in the presence of a man who likes women, who thinks they are beautiful, who makes them feel lovely, who delights in them. He genuinely likes women, and men that like women are liked by women.
He feels no need to validate himself to other men by bragging about his exploits. He never kisses and tells. Ever. His encounters with women are never about bolstering his own self-esteem or adding another notch to his bedpost. It is all about respect.
It is never about taking something for himself, but always about sharing something with her. For he knows that all experiences in life are amplified once they are shared.
His biggest fear is to be perceived as just another man; he is not like other men, nor does he aspire to be.
If he thought for a moment that she regretted her encounter with him in any way, or somehow felt sad or hurt because of him, it would break his heart. He can't bear the thought that a woman would ever feel she was manipulated by him.
And yet he doesn't mask his desires as a man. He never portrays indifference or apathy in an attempt to sneak under the radar. Instead he embraces his sexuality, presents it to her without presumption, is delighted if she responds favorably but deeply respectful if she does not.
He enters every one of his romantic adventures with newness and excitement, like his first love all over again. He knows that the impact he makes on her, and that she makes on him, will resonate with both of them for years.
And will he be hurt? Will he feel the pangs of loss when it ends? Of course. But he loves it all just the same.
He lives his life believing that every interaction in life is, in essence, a seduction. And so he assumes a woman is always interested. It might be a false assumption, of course, but it is a pleasant assumption, and so it is the way he has chosen to live his life.
He never defends himself when accused of being a player. He knows the truth: that he never plays with a woman's emotions. He is at peace with himself.
And so he makes no attempt at apology or justification for the way he is; he desires neither empathy nor absolution, nor even, for that matter, understanding. He has no need to defend himself because women are his greatest defenders.
Instead he believes his intentions are pure and mutually desired. He is genuine and honest, maybe the most honest man she has ever met. And women have demonstrated over and over to him that honesty is the best aphrodisiac.
And to him, they are all his girls. Every woman is his woman. He has immense compassion for women. He sees their sadness and their loss, their faded dreams, their dead and dying relationships, their stultifying careers and responsibilities, and he makes it his mission to impart beauty to their life again.
Yes, he has been created by women, formed by them, and inspired by them.
He shares in their secrets...
Zan
Copyright © 2006 Alabaster Communications Inc
"... The manifesto of a lover. It is crystallized and fine, honest and smooth like a polished diamond..." --
posted by John Hutchison at 11:01 PM 0 comments links to this post
Sunday, December 24, 2006
RULES OF LOVE WHAT I FEEL
I would rather die then not be able to open my heart to a lady there's no life in fame fortune power ego its all false hoods and empty walls I have walked plaves been places been in places lived like no man has ever walked or dared to walk or had courage to walk ; I am super healthy and not my age biologically or really mentally as I feel life so very strong I can get hurt easy but if I amnot allowed to love as i keep dreaming of then i will forever leave this world soon as i choose fit I fear not death at all ; I have perhaps lived several full lives ; we all make our own self made purgatories ; we all have those dark places we hide those skeletons in dare never to reveal I must truly love again with my heart or surely perish I have seen things in nature and sciences and life that perhaps nobody has seen I don't know I have seen life within insane asylums I have seen and done impossible things and I have loved the best is I have loved if I cannot express this then I leave ; as true burning love makes life truly enjoyable a bonding of 2 souls for me this Christmas is bleak but I keep up the energy to make others happy why because I understand what I feel ; rantings of a madman or hopeless romantic ; maybe but historically love is the greatest of emotions wars have been fought over a lady over love I know I have been there wars within our minds are sometimes the greatest I only ask the universe to love again is that bad ???????? Christmas eve 2006 over and out john Hutchinson
posted by John Hutchison at 8:32 PM 0 comments links to this post
RULES OF TRUE LOVE
our last picture together a few years ago before she went to India we met in 1988 full fires of love burned within us both ;hottest love ever ; well I could not follow her there ; India ; this picture taken in Sherman oaks my lesson in searching for someone to open my heart again is that one has to finalize a love like ours so I fucked up a few relationships like with Corinne a beautiful soul she is and a few others self realizations but now for awhile since 2000 about 2 years ago I let yin go we are still friends but now my heart again is wide open for a wife forever and a day but guarded a bit as I don't know certain things that are real or are not the floodgates of fires of love will open to forever engulf you
posted by John Hutchison at 8:10 PM 0 comments links to this post
www.cynnpr.blogspot.com
of all the souls I have known she is the most human I have ever encountered I truly want my angels to guide her threw this now my Christmas will be on duty for her and her family thank you
posted by John Hutchison at 12:35 AM 0 comments links to this post
http://johnkhutchison.blogspot.com/2006/11/don-juan-said-does-this-path-have.html
Saturday, November 18, 2006
DON JUAN SAID DOES THIS PATH HAVE A HEART ?
more pictures of the place one of my mentors or heroes don Juan said each path is one of only a million paths you must keep in mind a path is just a path if you feel you must follow it you need not stay with it under any circumstances ;any path is only a path. There's no affront to yourself or others in dropping it if that what your heart tells you to do, but your decision to keep on the path or to leave it must be free of ambition and fear . I warn you ; look at every path closely and deliberately . try it as many times you think necessary ;then ask yourself and yourself alone ne question. is this . does this path have a heart . all paths are the same they lead nowhere . they are paths going threw the brush or under it ,does this path have a heart is the only question . if it does then the path is good , if it does not it is of no use ,if your path is love the goal is truly unimportant the process will have heart indeed you can only be real on your own path by straying from yourself you must get closer and closer to what you are always find you in love each man is his own personal challenge I have always chosen the path with a heart I see no logic in hatred or manipulation if I die along I guess I will until then I am me searching the voids on waiting on the edge of forever and I always will be me
http://johnkhutchison.blogspot.com/2006/11/love-power-of-million-suns.html
Saturday, November 18, 2006
LOVE THE POWER OF A MILLION SUNS
We need others . We need others to love and we need to be loved by them ..There's no doubt that without it .we to ,like the infant left alone would cease to develop choose madness and even death and to say further love is always open arms .if you close your arms about love you will find that your only holding only to yourself further to say real love always creates . it never destroys . in this leis mans only promise
http://johnkhutchison.blogspot.com/2006/11/love-paths.html
Sunday, November 19, 2006
LOVE PATHS
Writing: Really I rarely do it, dark skies heavy rain. hum rather in reflective mode rolf; well past my 15 month adventure; in reality makes one fly over the koos nest a picnic, they have no ideas on what goes on, back on topics by of Caelos Casenedas the teachings of Don Juans wisdom stuff I read along time ago;
Yes I have loved many woman and they will never forget it as well as I; and as long as I am with that lady I am indeed faithful, as I focus all my empathic energy into her; as well as many other things; morhicogenic fields; Don't forget my studies are advanced life extension. and life forces. So any lady who says yes I am with forever and a day;
My ex recommend me to others one lady wrote an article I forwarded to scientists Col. John Alexander; as it's a unusual case of energy transference; Hey john you collect guns; yes I collect them more for engineering and history I make my own also; I fear not death; I have fought in many wars; I will go to the cannons if our freedom is at stake; I treasure our soldiers out there on many great wars;
But hum my favorite topic on this gloomy day remember Don Juan as saying a path is just a path there are million of paths .all paths are the same they lead nowhere; they go into bushes over bushes but one has heart the other does not. .I choose myself the path with a heart. ok
Love then recognizes needs physical and emotional .It sees as well as it looks. Listens while it hears. Love touches fondles and revels in sensual gratification. Love is free and cannot be realized unless its left free. Love finds its own path. Sets its own pace and travels in its own way. Love recognizes and appreciates its uniqueness. Love needs no recognition, for its effects are is recognizable it is not true love at all. ok folks - man woman men he knows he must trust and believe in love for it's the only approach to love. Yet if he expresses his trust and belief, society doesn't hesitate to abuse him and take him for a fool.
Love and the practices of the real world seem at odds, miles apart. It is no wander so many few folks do not have the courage to bridge the gap for in practice the gaps seams unbridgeable, social engineering hopeless romantic or other labels. man has on one hand the understanding and drives for growing into love. But society makes this knowledge difficult in practice. So folks find it easier to put aside love. . And join forces with society in questioning its supposed realityŠ. I myself seek no power; yet ill protect those I love at all costs and lend hands in injustices I am not into pretending to me macho as it's a waste of energy .yet ill do very daring and dangerous things; as seen on video rolf he. when forces say no I say yes;
As I see all the ridiculous junk. Walls folks put up to protect themselves; gee some folks get lost on there paths and bury there existence with ego; or how important they are but in reality it's a child seeking something but not understanding why; maybe the lost love long forgotten in layers of self misinformation;
Some take to drugs or booze; believe in you as you're but one special human; my scientist buddies are always frustrated at me; they think I should be this weird character on a path of great determination to prove something. In reality machines fascinate me as well as buildings and navy ships why naval ships. The best of engineered things plus I love adventure and love making. Gee I am sorry I am no scientist; a discover perhaps; but little time I do spend in anti gravity hardly any really but given a challenge ill do it; why because its impossible to most folks; nothing is impossible; so ill do it but not like a crazed madman in some laboratory but in all aspects of life, love, and engineering; sure folks have made millions off of me; oh john is nuts but hey we got credentials; or it could be media stuff; I don't worry about it as its there path and in the end did they walk the path with a heart?
I have several job opportunities one is with USA pentagon. NASA or the retired government guys the knights temporal group or ram group; then Hollywood; threw Hollywood new things can be brought to our kids and folks hum but the path must have a heart; ramblings of a mad man perhaps from your point of view its al relative right; well onward I walk throwing information your way;
Man's function is to unfold his true self. equal to this function is helping others to be strong. and to perfect themselves as unique individualsŠ he will do this best by affording all persons the opportunity to show their feelings, express there aspirations, and share there dreams; for the world is hollow and I have touched the sky; he must see the forces labeled evil. as emanating from suffering people who like himself are human and in the process of attempting to perfect there beings gee we know a few; he must combat these forces of evil through an active love which is deeply concerned and interested in each person quest for self discoveryŠ
He must believe its not the world that is ugly. bitter and destructive, but it what man has done to the world that makes it appear so Š he must be a model. not a model of perfection. a state often not often reached by man but a model human being .for being a good human for being a good human being is the best he or she can beŠ. He must be able forgive himself for being less then perfect Š
He or she must understand change is inevitable, and when it is directed in love and self realization, is always good he or she must be convinced that behavior .to be learned must be tried out; to be is to do ŠWe start getting interesting in saying he or she or whoever. must learn that he or she cannot be loved by all. That's the ideal. In a world of men woman it is not often found. he. She or he can is the finest plum in the world. Ripe juicy succulent and offer himself to all, but we must remember that. that there will be folks who don't like plumbs Šshe he must understand that if she or he is the worlds finest plum, and someone's he loves does not like plums .he or she has the choice of becoming a banana. but she or he must is warned in choosing to becoming a banana. he she will be a second rate banana, but she or he can always be the best plum ŠHe she must realize that if she or he chooses to be a second rate banana .he she runs the risk of the loved one finding he or she second best and wanting only the best, discarding him or her well she or he can then spend there life trying to become the best banana which is inpossable if he or she is a plumb -----or he or she can seek again to be the best plum he or she must endeavuor to love all folks even if your not loved by them . he does not love to be loved he or she loves to love. she he must reject no person for she he realizes that we are part of the whole and to reflect one man or woman is to reject himself Š
He or she must know that he or she loves all and is rejected by one .she or he must not pull away in fear, pain, disappointment, or anger. Its not the others fault. He or she was not ready for what was offered, love was not offered to her or him with conditions. He or she gave love because he or she was fortunate enough to have it to give. and because he felt joy in the giving and not what he or she would receive in return Š understand that if he or she is rejected in one love ok. there are hundreds of others waiting love, the idea that there is but one right love is deception. There are many right loves; hey it turned sunny out there; some romances marriages. I will love you as long as I can help you grow in love wise words; for real love is dedicated to continual becoming.
When for any reason this process ceases love becomes tedious, listless, and is doomed to fade away. To let down those walls and always forever young a relationship must be. Nothing is impossible and problems can be dealt with. Exploration of intimacy again, full circle, empathic between the two, as oneŠ
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